Celebrate recovery helped me to see that the biggest roadblock to healing is un-forgiveness.      Years ago whenever I heard teachings on forgiveness,  I  didn’t listen too closely because  I felt I was a very forgiving person.  But I was mistaking “write off” for forgiveness.   It went both ways: If I was accused I would deny the harm, or withdraw physically and or emotionally from that person. If I was wronged,  I likewise would deny that harm was done, and often withdraw  physically emotionally  from the wrong-doer. In both cases I found myself withdrawing mentally as well (mental withdrawal from me was when I would forget..the extent of a relationship, the existence of a relationship, or the situation in general) .   The harder it was to deny or withdraw the more likely I would act  on my addictive or compulsive behaviors.  In addition the relationships I had were  shallow or eventually abandoned.  And while I could walk around with a smile, the trap was in denying the hurt, I ultimately had to deny myself (a mere human), and others (also human).   And erring is human!

Celebrate recovery’s  Principle 1  says  that   pretending the hurt isn’t there or that it doesn’t bother you anymore won’t solve your problems.

Jeremiah 6:14 (TLB) reminds us that “You can’t heal a wound by saying it’s not there!”

This is key to why we look back in recovery

As I work through my regular inventory I realize the roots of my compulsive behaviors and addictive desires can be traced back to buried pain.  This is recovery up to this point:   realizing I am wounded,  know God can heal,  allowing him to heal,   open up the wound,  confess our wounded-ness,   allow God to clean it out,   and now be willing to make amends and offer forgiveness.. This is the lasting solution…..  more… (click here for complete lesson)

  1. […] Acknowledge feelings of hurt, anger, or shame and commit to doing something about them. […]


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